Time for reflection

There is one thing that I have been feeling missing during the past two weeks while being at home. This is time with myself. I love my friends and family very much, but I need the time to reflect on my life. Otherwise I lose myself. So I have decided to take that little moment now and think what was the year 2005 for me.

Already in the beginning of last January I knew: This is going to be the year of important endings and new beginnings. And so it has been indeed!

The endings:

1. Bachelor degree. 6 years as a student of Tartu University came to an end in June. And together with this the end of life in Tartu. It was very tough at times during the last 5 months, but it was worth every second of it. Although I never made it to "real student" (managed to fulfill only 3 criteria out of 4 during my university time: a) lived in a dormitory, b) failed an exam, c) walked over the arc of a certain bridge in Tartu city center. Did not have sex in library private study booth...) I look back to these years and consider it to be the best time full of important exercises for independent life.

2. Estonian National Youth Council. 2 years as a board member of ENL and 1 year as chairman of ENL came to an end also in June. This was extremely interesting and challenging time for me. I made a lot of friends and met with many people, learned about how public and NGO sectors work in Estonia, how policies and politics is done. I learned to fight and debate and work together with conditions where solution needs to be found with people who have totally different objectives. This was the time which challenged my values and taught me what is really important to me. I definitely improved in managing myself, my time, my decisions and the way I work with people. And I am very glad that I have made my impact to that organisation.

3. AIESEC. 6 years of active membership in AIESEC and the circle is completed: Newie -> LC EB member -> MCVP -> MCP -> LC oldie -> trainee. I tried out many of the options you can take: selling, matching, servicing both incoming and outgoing exchange, conference management (but I was never OCP), facilitating and chairing both national and international conferences, teamwork, team management, mentoring, advising, training, experiencing the traineeship abroad. I consider realising 8 outgoing and 1 incoming exchange as a good achievement. I have made the friends for life - friends who I can trust and count on in any possible situation. This organisation taught me, how to live my dreams. I know, without AIESEC I would not be the person I am today.

New starts:

1. Life abroad. In July I took off from Estonia to Bangladesh, which made the start to a totally new life in a totally new environment. Starting from everyday routines like speaking, eating with hands, wearing sari, salwar kameez or fotua, taking rikshaw to roam around, price negotiations in the market to questions of religion and social values - everything is different! It is exciting, it is facsinating, it is not always easy to cope with, it is unusual, it is eyes opening. It is survival: I have been thrown to unknown water and I am swimming. I am exploring how well I am able to adjust to the waves and wind coming to my way and learning to deal better with the new ones all the time. And at the same time I am enjoying the scenery I've never seen before.

2. Real work experience. Finally I can add a real work experience to my CV as someone who has been establishing an HR department in a private company! Ok, as a trainee initially, but this will change soon. It is great to learn how things are working out in "real world". And it is great to work for an organisation feeling that it really needs me. Extra spice is added by different cultural experience. I'm developing every day.

3. The love of my life. It happened very unexpectedly, but it has been so right! He is someone who I have been looking for without knowing that I am looking for anyone. He makes me feel so strongly as I have never felt before. He makes me very very happy. And the most important, he feels the same way!

So these where the main highlights of the year 2005. Looking at my blog post on January 10 2005, I can read as the expectation for the year: "I want the degree and freedom and traineeship and life!" I can smile and say: I got everything I wanted. I have a bachelor degree, my freedom to decide over my life, traineeship in an exotic country and I am living more than ever.

What to wish from the new year if I have all? I wish that :
- I would not forget all the learnings that I have got from the endings of 2005
- The new starts of 2005 would continue to be rewarding experiences in 2006
- I would always be there for my friends and family no matter how far I physically am from them
- I live up well to new challenges as HR Manager and MBA student in Bangladesh

Happy new year! :o)